The Struggle to Surrender

Why can't I surrender to you, O' Lord?
I want to but fear holds me back,
it stops me in my tracks.
Am I afraid I won't get what I desire?
Satan tries to convince me that you are a liar.
Why can't I see, that you want so much more for me?
More than I could ever imagine.
Blessings that I cannot fathom.
I am hooked on my own cheap pleasures.
A drug that I seem to treasure.
It is an addiction to sin, a battle I know I cannot win.
Not without you in my life,
can I hope to rid myself of all this strife.
Chaos is what my life has become.
Sin has left me completely undone.
Like Paul, I want to do what is right?
I truly want to win this fight.
My arrogance seems to devour me.
Will I ever let God have the victory?
Nothing is impossible in God's sight.
It is time for me to give up the fight.
To surrender my will is so hard to do.
Help me, Oh Lord, just give it to you.

Marty Shuff